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最終更新日 : 2012/01/29 (Sun) 09:39
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Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven\'t said enough.
Only a free and unrestrained press can effectively expose deception in government.
If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have in your hands is a non-working cat.
Research is what I\'m doing when I don\'t know what I\'m doing.
Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.
The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by loading honors on your head.
The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
When I am dead, I hope it may be said: \'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.
I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.
In the begining there was nothing and God said \'Let there be light\', and there was still nothing but everybody could see it.
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Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.
Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, \'Where have I gone wrong?\' Then a voice says to me, \'This is going to take more than one night.\'
Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.
It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
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The competent programmer is fully aware of the limited size of his own skull. He therefore approaches his task with full humility, and avoids clever tricks like the plague.
An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.
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Why was I with her? She reminds me of you. In fact, she reminds me more of you than you do!
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.
Research is what I\'m doing when I don\'t know what I\'m doing.
They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.
Future historians will be able to study at the Jimmy Carter Library, the Gerald Ford Library, the Ronald Reagan Library, and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I\'ve never tried before.
Fill what\'s empty, empty what\'s full, and scratch where it itches.
Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
But at my back I always hear Time\'s winged chariot hurrying near.
Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.
Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
Men have become the tools of their tools.
The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
War doesn\'t make boys men, it makes men dead.
The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn\'t get bigger or heavier.
Louis Pasteur\'s theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.
DOS Computers manufactured by companies such as IBM, Compaq, Tandy, and millions of others are by far the most popular, with about 70 million machines in use worldwide. Macintosh fans, on the other hand, may note that cockroaches are far more numerous than humans, and that numbers alone do not denote a higher life form.
I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don\'t need.
Whether you think that you can, or that you can\'t, you are usually right.
Why did God create dentists? -- In his infinite love, he thought it would be charitable to His creatures to let them see what Hell is like, during their lives.
I never forget a face, but in your case I\'ll be glad to make an exception.
To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.
When I die I\'m going to leave my body to science fiction.
If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
There\'s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
Lohr\'s Law: The future is merely the past with a twist ? and better tools.
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
We\'re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.
Marry me and I\'ll never look at another horse!
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
I\'m always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can\'t understand is, if they don\'t know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
Only a free and unrestrained press can effectively expose deception in government.
About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.
The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. It makes the hand bleed that uses it.
Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.
Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.
The belief in the possibility of a short decisive war appears to be one of the most ancient and dangerous of human illusions.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.
Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.
There\'s many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
It\'s clearly a budget. It\'s got a lot of numbers in it.
Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.
There are many kinds of people in the world. Are you one of them?
Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
When I die I\'m going to leave my body to science fiction.
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Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.
A state of war only serves as an excuse for domestic tyranny.
If you\'re sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign.
Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.
He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.
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If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?
If there is no Hell, a good many preachers are obtaining money under false pretences.
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If there?s one thing I know it?s God does love a good joke.
Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.
2 + 2 = 5, for extremely large values of 2.
Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
We didn\'t lose the game; we just ran out of time.
The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.
Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.
Emulate your heros, but don\'t carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.
Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.
Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
Just because bulldozers are used to build highways doesn\'t mean bulldozers are the best way to travel on a highway.
I\'m Jewish. I don\'t work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.
All rights left. All lefts reserved. All reserves removed. All removes right.
We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.
I\'m not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It\'s just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.
If it wasn\'t for muscle spasms, I wouldn\'t get any exercise at all.
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I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.
I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better.
C++: an octopus made by nailing extra legs onto a dog
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.
Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.
Sex is like air. It\'s only a big deal if you can\'t get any.
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn\'t take it out of my garden.
To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war.
The graveyards are full of indispensable men.
Honolulu, it\'s got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, and sharks for the wife\'s mother.
Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.
Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, \'Where have I gone wrong?\' Then a voice says to me, \'This is going to take more than one night.\'
I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.
Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.
All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
It\'s strange, isn\'t it. You stand in the middle of a library and go \'aaaaagghhhh\' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
Where are we going, and why am I in this handbasket?
Machine. Unexpectedly, I\'d invented a time
It\'s dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that\'s successful enough to require a large and complex set of software
You\'ll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.
A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That\'s where we come in; we\'re computer professionals. We cause accidents.
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they\'re going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
The trouble with the Internet is that it\'s replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.
If it wasn\'t for muscle spasms, I wouldn\'t get any exercise at all.
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
The trouble with the Internet is that it\'s replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.
My occupation now, I suppose, is jail inmate.
Hearing nuns\' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.
The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.
The covers of this book are too far apart.
Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.
The difference between \'involvement\' and \'commitment\' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was \'involved\' - the pig was \'committed\'.
Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
When I die I\'m going to leave my body to science fiction.
I think \'Hail to the Chief\' has a nice ring to it.
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.
The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
A pint of sweat, saves a gallon of blood.
True. When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.
Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.
If you haven\'t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.
They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I\'m going to miss mine by just a few days.
Before the war is ended, the war party assumes the divine right to denounce and silence all opposition to war as unpatriotic and cowardly.
Experience is what you get when you were expecting something else.
There is no idea so simple and powerful that you can\'t get zillions of people to misunderstand it.
Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
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Real punks help little old ladies across the street because it shocks more people than if they spit on the sidewalk.
So I rang up a local building firm, I said \'I want a skip outside my house.\' He said \'I\'m not stopping you.\'
War is not the continuation of politics with different means, it is the greatest mass-crime perpetrated on the community of man.
Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
To err is human -- and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.
We have art to save ourselves from the truth.
I don\'t know why we are here, but I\'m pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.
There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.
There is no idea so simple and powerful that you can\'t get zillions of people to misunderstand it.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/26/(Thu) 10:28
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